“The quality of our relationships is what we have chosen it to be.”

On a certain day, I did have a difference of opinion with one of my dear friends; it disturbed me a lot. Our word exchanges were very different that day than on normal days. Suddenly I was awakened to the quality of the relationship that I enjoy with my friend. Of course, in hindsight, I discounted almost all the statements he made when I realized that he did not mean them, but it was more of “spur of the moment” statements. Today, we are still good friends, and when we recall the instance, we still laugh and enjoy it as a joke.

That’s not the main thing here. The main part is it made me look at all my relationships with my parents, siblings, friends, and relatives in a very detailed manner, and learn the intricacies and nuances of each relationship and the quality of each one of them. It became evident every relationship I have is unique, and they need to be maintained that way.

I realized that the quality of my relationships today is ultimately what I chose them to be. Then it’s also about the given “space” in a relationship. Yes, we do that externally, meaning with others, but the more important aspect is to have the space and accommodation within us, which in turn helps us to let them be themselves. Relationships are unique, need time and space, and evolve. The quality of our relationships is directly proportional to the quality of sustained inputs in the relationship.

Chetlur Shanthi Prasad

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